Feeling Lucky

Last month I went to chemo and while I was in the waiting room a guy was sitting there with about a half dozen or so scratch off lottery tickets. I was called into the chemo room before I could ask him about them. I’d like to have heard his story. The next week Eunice was leaving for West Virginia and as I was driving her to the airport I asked if she had ever played the lottery. The answer was no. I don’t either with the exception that I have bought Powerball tickets for Eunice and the kids at Christmas to put in their stockings. We’ve never come close to winning anything.

While Eunice was gone I bought a one dollar scratch off lottery ticket. I won $5, actually 4 since I was in for a buck. But I was committed to losing that dollar and I traded my winnings in for 5 more lottery tickets for the same game. This time I won $10, so I’m up 9 now. I’ve became that person that holds you up in line while they cash out their lottery tickets. I was still committed to losing my dollar so I went back to the gas station trading in my tickets for 10 more tickets; playing the same game and won $20. This lottery thing takes time, I’m really not enjoying it by now, and my commitment to losing a dollar is waning so I go cash out and call an end to the whole thing. I’m up $19 and I’m not happy about it. I’ve made 3 trips to the gas station, this was the week I'm not feeling well, the whole thing has become a pain, and I’ve shown an inability to lose a dollar. I only felt better when I used the money to buy pizza for the kids for dinner.

Yesterday I started my 4th cycle. We were going to do a scan after this cycle to see how things are going. But we know it is working and I’m going to have all 6 cycles so why do the scan. We will wait until after the 6th cycle and see what’s happening. It won’t all be gone and it’s a bit of a wait and see thing to see if the fast growing cells are gone. Perhaps the bigger news is I saw the guy in the waiting room again; he didn’t have any lottery tickets. I asked him about them and he told me his brother had given him 10 of them and he found them in his pocket and thought it was something to do while he was waiting. It had less to do with luck and more to do with boredom.

I don’t know about “luck”. But my brief dip into the lottery pool changed my view on luck. Luck is a random thing; a probability that isn’t in your favor. I have told many people I have been pretty lucky through this whole thing so far. The results of my scan aren’t going to be luck; the probability is in my favor. Good doctor, good nurses, good friends, lots of support, feeling well, and in general doing as well as can be expected. These are things I can count on or have some control over, not random luck. I’m not lucky, I’m grateful.

Eat Good Food, Be Kind, Tell the Truth

Click below for the collection of recipes or for an easy to print copy of a single recipe.

Collection of Recipes

Crispy Salmon with Spicy Lentils: Lentils have been described as resembling coins, so they are a symbol of wealth. And since lentils plump up after being cooked or boiled in water, their growth symbolizes increasing wealth. In other words, they are lucky.

The Friday Update: Just the Facts